Keeping It In The Family

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When I was a graduate assistant teaching classes about cultural pluralism, I once had a group of speakers come from a local GLBTQ organization to speak to my students, most of whom were white Christian small-town Ohio residents with not much familiarity with these issues. The speakers were great, and included a young woman who said something I’ve never forgotten.

One of my students challenged her, saying, “Would you feel so great about gays and lesbians if it were someone in your own family?” She responded, “I hope one of my children is gay! So many children are born into families who make them feel terrible and wrong for being who they are. So many gay and lesbian teens commit suicide because they don’t get the support they need from their families or communities. Every gay or lesbian child born into an accepting family is hopefully one less gay or lesbian teen suicide.”

I still think that’s a pretty radical (and awesome) thing to say, and I am reminded of it every time I read a story by a straight person who has a child and believes that child might be gay, whether it’s a five-year-old boy who dresses up as Daphne or more recently, a six-year-old boy with a his first same-sex crush on Blaine from Glee, who is admittedly pretty dreamy. The mothers defending their kids’ right to be who they are and standing up to make sure other kids get the same chance are showing the world what it means to be a straight ally in the best possible way.

I don’t know if either of my girls are lesbians, but I hope every day that I am making it easier for other kids to be who they are, whomever that might be.