At first, I didn’t know that there’s a lot said here that wasn’t said in the Atlantic article: it’s very tricky to know how to make good teachers, hiring Ivy Leaguers or giving them merit pay hasn’t necessarily worked, the impact of teachers on a classroom can be massive, etc. But I also liked the tone of the article, which was not accusatory, but instead acknowledged that many teachers want to be better (myself included), but in the early years, we often are just as mystified as to how to accomplish that improvement as scholars and journalists are. Like the article says, why buy a better teacher, when it might be possible to build a better one instead? They acknowledged that increased opportunities for women and minorities resulted in them leaving teaching, to some degree, for “better” jobs, which hasn’t helped the profession either. A recent survey of teachers in my state backed up the theory that new teachers need a lot more mentorship and guidance in the first few years. The teachers over on the EC Ning seem a little nervous about why all the sudden attention to measuring teachers and what that might mean in an era of massive governmental budget cuts. There’s some great stuff in the comments over at Crooked Timber too.

I love the idea of a 49-step taxonomy of “bite-size” techniques to make teachers more effective, regardless of subject matter. In shifting from college teaching to high school, that is one major difference that has changed how I think about my work: subject-matter knowledge is much more integral in college-level work, which expects a level of scholarship, while high-school level teaching requires more attention to classroom management, effective pedagogy, and emotional connection (in addition to subject-matter knowledge). I loved the story of Lemov, the introvert who transforms in front of a classroom, mostly because I, a life-long introvert, hope that transformation happens in my room too. I think the idea that a good teacher needs to be a stand-up comedian or a talented thespian is one of the ideas that keeps people out of the classroom unnecessarily. I know I will definitely be buying Teach Like a Champion, Lemov’s book about his taxonomy, when it comes out, and maybe even in hardcover, and I’ll probably read it this summer, when I always spend hours and hours thinking about how to do my job better.

Maybe it’s naïve of me, but I would love to think that we are finally going to try seriously to make teaching a seriously respected and valued profession in this country. All apologies to the doctors, nurses, priests and others out there, but I don’t know of a more important paying job for our world’s future.

Spring Break!

Mine is only a week away, and since my girls have a different school schedule, spring break is usually a staycation around these parts. I try to tackle a house project each year, but it’s also a time to rest and rejuvenate. This year, I’m going to finally cash in a gift certificate my wonderful mother-in-law gave me for Christmas and get a massage, manicure and pedicure one day during the week. I’m going to sleep, and I’m going to read for pleasure, and I’m going to cook new recipes and just relax.

In addition to resting, I’m in the mood for some new beginnings. While I’m not making any massive changes, I’m enjoying the smaller ones: a new short haircut, a new blog template, new ideas for my classes next year, and new projects at school.

It’s going to be lovely, in a very low-key, old grown-up kind of way!

How to deal with a winter that seems never-ending? Make warm-weather plans!

When we were looking at houses a few years ago, one of the assets we were really hoping to find was a backyard. We were lucky enough to find a house that does have a backyard and were willing to overlook that the yard was essentially one large fenced-in rectangle, with no landscaping, patio, deck or other features that would make it more attractive or usable. The existing fence is two-third wood and one third chain-link, which is as weird-looking as it sounds, and the yard is surrounded by trees, which means we don’t need to add shade, but are limited in what we can plant.

Since we moved in, we have made some major updates to the interior of the house and have planted bushes and flowers in the front yard, but all we’ve done to the backyard is put up a pretty basic swingset for the girls. My goal this summer is start making the backyard a more attractive place to be, especially since in the spring and summer, we like to eat dinner out there, grill and have backyard parties. Our neighbors did a backyard remodel last year, including a pergola for their deck and some pretty extensive landscaping, and I’ve been jealous ever since.

I started by thinking small, after seeing a link to some whimsical solar-powered garden ornaments. I might even let my girls pick out one or two animal statues to place around. Then I started thinking about swings– my dad has one in his backyard, and it’s always been one of my favorite places to spend a sunny afternoon. Since our back yard is pretty shaded already, we could think about a set that doesn’t include an awning, like this one, this one, or even this one. Then I started remembering how much I’ve always hated the chain-link part of our fence, and read some sites about these amazing new hybrid hydrangeas that can bloom in partial shade and would bloom from spring to early fall. I’ve always loved hydrangeas, and right now the only flowering plant in our backyard is a lovely dogwood that doesn’t bloom every year. So I started daydreaming about a hedge of hydrangeas along the chain-link fence, in several different shades, maybe mixed in with some nice green bushes so the effect doesn’t get too overwhelming. You can see how my dreams were increasingly growing larger, right? So far, some planting, some swing assembly, which isn’t too bad, but the dollar amount is steadily climbing.

So then, of course, I started having patio visions. Right now, we have a nice iron table and a bunch of random plastic lawn chairs to go around it, which sit on the part of the yard right outside the back door, which is semi-grassy, semi-muddy. The back of the house is bordered by a cracked concrete sidewalk, that has been an eyesore (in my mind) since we moved in. I’d love to break it up and get it out there altogether and then replace it with something fabulous, but even in my daydreams, I don’t see myself with either a jackhammer or a limitless backyard budget. But in my internet travels, I started to see a fair amount of articles about covering old concrete. Specifically, I saw this story about covering it in pea gravel, which other sites had called economical and relatively easy for DIY homeowners. The patio is the (modest) crown of my backyard dreams, and it really does seem pretty do-able, once you get the gravel delivered and decide how to make a border (Pavers? Bricks? Concrete edgers?)

Now, of course, that’s easier said than done. I can see my husband shaking his head right now, even (hi honey!). The most ambitious we’ve gotten with DIY projects have been painting, interior and exterior, putting together our swingset, and ripping up old carpet from the stairs. The patio will be the biggest project we’ve attempted, but so far, it honestly doesn’t look that tricky, and it seems like the cheapest solution. I think we’d get a fair amount of bang for our buck, and between two youngish, healthyish adults, I think we could do it all ourselves.

Whether we accomplish this spring and summer or only get started, it has certainly helped me while away some winter hours.

Anyway, I forget how I ended up there, but I started searching for punctuation-related items on Etsy a few nights ago and came up with some real gems:

My favorite mark of punctuation is the interrobang. Again, I say, what’s not to like? It’s graphically distinctive, it expresses “attitude, curiosity and wonder,” and since I spend much of my life with fourteen-year-old girls, I definitely see a need it would fill if we had more access to it. On Etsy, I found Interrobang necklace and among others, a set of punctuation cross-stitch patterns including the interrobang.

I searched mainly for house goods and necklaces, because necklaces are the only kind of jewelry I wear regularly (apart from wedding rings). I found some cool ones using typewriter keys, like this one with a semicolon and colon. There’s also a lovely
!?@ necklace that isn’t keys, but has the same vibe. Finally, there’s a Ampersand necklace that appears to be laser-cut from an old vinyl record.

I’m not going to splurge on it all, because then I’d be that Crazy Punctuation Lady. But there’s something kind of amazing about them all, and very soon, you might see me around, wearing my grammatical love around my neck.

Today, Sophie was home from school recovering from a stomach bug, and my husband was sleeping in, so I was rushing around to get Lucy and I ready for school and ran out of time to pack Lucy a lunch. So I promised her I would bring her a surprise for lunch, and at lunch time, my sister and I went to the nearby grocery, bought her a Lunchable (the turkey and cracker kind) and brought it to her. We snuck in through the side door and up to her table before she noticed we had come in, and when she turned? And saw us? The burst of happiness on her face was so bright. And she hugged me, and then my sister, and grinned at her little stack of cheese and crackers and tiny pack of Skittles, and hugged us both again, and scrubbed her little head against us when she did, and I just about melted.

Also today, when I got home, grouchy from a long day, Sophie was so excited to see me, and clearly feeling so much better. And then while we were watching a “short show” before bathtime, Sophie asked me if she could brush my hair while we watched. And we sat there, her little fingers so gentle, twisting and stroking my hair, and then she asked me if she could take a break (of course), and she laid her sweet chubby cheek against my back and wrapped her arms around my waist for just a few moments, before the hair-brushing resumed.

Even now, though it just happened today, my eyes are watering when I write this, even though they are right upstairs, splashing in the bathtub. How much longer will we have that easy unclouded joy between us, and how will I ever watch them walk away.

On an entirely different note, Friday night I went to see Crazy Heart with my dear friend for her birthday. If Jeff Bridges doesn’t win the Oscar for best actor, I’ll be shocked– like all the reviews are saying, it’s a career capstone kind of performance, but more importantly, the entire movie revolves around it, and you can’t imagine it being played by anyone else. I was never that familiar with Bridges’ best work before this, but for this alone, his talents have indelibly marked in my mind. I can easily seeing it win the Oscar for music as well (the soundtrack is already on my wishlist, but won’t stay there for long), and it will be well-deserved, but if Maggie Gyllenhaal takes the Oscar, I think that will be a mistake. My supporting bet would have gone to Colin Farrell, who completely surprised me here and played his part with restraint and appreciation for subtle nuances. It’s the kind of movie where some archetype characters are present and there are some familiar tropes at hand, but the movie manages to surprise you and avoid some of the easier turns it could have taken. I really loved it, and am already looking forward to renting it when that time comes.

Yesterday the girls went to their art and theater classes for only the second time, and it really seems like we found a good match there, which is great considering the money they cost! We had big Brownie plans this morning for a Women in Sports Day at a local college, complete with a basketball game, free pizza and prizes and an ice cream social. But around 3 AM this morning, the weekend took a sharp turn for the worse when Sophie woke up crying from a tummy ache that quickly turned into projectile vomiting every hour until 8 AM. I moved my blanket into their room and slept fitfully between vomiting fits and then scrubbed down the bathroom once she moved downstairs to watch a Harry Potter movie and mourn her ruined day. I’m hoping it’s only a 24-hour bug, otherwise, I fear for my Monday!

Here are some of my favorite quotes on the subject:

“This manuscript of yours that has just come back from another editor is a precious package. Don’t consider it rejected. Consider that you’ve addressed it ‘to the editor who can appreciate my work’ and it has simply come back stamped ‘Not at this address’. Just keep looking for the right address.”–Barbara Kingsolver

“I discovered that rejections are not altogether a bad thing. They teach a writer to rely on his own judgment and to say in his heart of hearts, “To hell with you.”–Saul Bellow

“Talent is helpful in writing, but guts are absolutely essential.” –Jessamyn West

“We keep going back, stronger, not weaker, because we will not allow rejection to beat us down. It will only strengthen our resolve. To be successful there is no other way.” –Earl G. Graves, founder and publisher of Black Enterprise Magazine

Having said that, when I got a rejection recently, I did not immediately react with a “go to hell” attitude, and I have not yet started looking for the right address. Instead, I moped for awhile and doubted whether or not I’ve ever written a poem worth anything or in fact should ever try to publish another poem. Then I ate some pizza, spent quality time with my husband and kids, graded a pile of papers, watched Lost–and still felt lingering feelings of failure.

But in the very act of writing this blog post, I am trying to get some much-needed perspective. Because I’m not going to stop writing poetry, and because I think trying to make my poems better is a worthy goal, and because I would like to see a poem or two in the pages of a journal someday. And because all those things are true, perseverance is the order of the day

Maybe it’s because I’m the opposite of athletic, but the Olympics have never been a big deal for me. Sure, I’ll watch a good gymnastics routine if it’s on, and I enjoy some figure skating every now and again. But I haven’t watched one minute of it this year and I don’t plan to. But as I watch my Facebook friends talk about curling and snowboard crossing and Johnny Weir getting robbed, I start to wonder again if I’m missing something.

What about you? If you’re an Olympics fan, tell me why. If not, join my new club. I’ll be over here, watching Lost and wondering if they’re ever going to explain just one piece of this enormous mythology without adding on more layers of questions and mysteries first.

One book I didn’t read in high school English is the Bible, which now I teach every year in my ninth grade class. It seemed strange to me to teach at a secular school at first, but now that I’ve taught it for several years, it would absolutely be part of my dream high school English curriculum. This conversation began in that first linked blog post for me, when another commenter brought it up, and then continuedin a really thought-provoking discussion of why we teach literature and why it’s valuable to study literature together.

Every year, it’s one of my favorite units to teach. The students who have come to us from religious schools get to display their knowledge, it ties in well with the Five Major Faiths unit they do in Medieval World History at the same time, and the stories are accessible yet rich with language. They write an exegesis essay and they also do a presentation on allusions, a concept that can be surprisingly tricky for them to grasp, but once they do, their excitement is a thrill to watch. The themes we introduce are timeless: jealousy, exile, faith, destiny vs. free will, and they enrich our units for the rest of the year.

Right now, my kids’ bedtime stories come from my old copy of A Children’s Bible in 365 Stories. Before the snowstorms, we just finished the story of Gideon, from the book of Judges, which is also the title of one of my favorite My Morning Jacket songs, which is part of the reason Biblical familiarity is so important. Whether you’re religious or not, you miss out on so much richness in Western art and literature if you can’t pick up the Biblical references. Also, our children won’t be raised in a church-going family, but we aren’t choosing to keep them ignorant of religion either. We want them to grow up aware of all religions, so that they can choose for themselves if/when the time comes.

So that’s my first entry in my dream high school curriculum. How about you?

I really really really need my work to matter to me. Not just to other people but to ME. I have to get something out of it and I’m not just talking about a paycheck.

I also need my work to matter to me– I have to believe it is important work that is worth doing, that has some kind of value. This is partly because in some ways, I’m a workaholic–I’m always thinking about my job and what it is and how I do it and how I could be doing it better, and if my job can’t sustain that, I go a little nuts.

If I can’t get something out of it, I need room to do some other stuff to feed that hungry part of myself who wants to do Good Work and Write.

This is why even when I was waiting tables two or three days a week, I was scribbling poems on the back sides of receipts–writing has to be part of my life, and how I make sense of the world I’m in.

I am not much motivated by money (unfortunately) or praise but I do appreciate acknowledgment. I’m a sucker for respectful acknowledgment.

I’m not motivated by money either–what teacher can be? But I do enjoy acknowledgment, and I do enjoy earned praise. I don’t need empty phrases, but the spontaneous and sincere pat on the back? I lap it up like a cat with milk.

If I don’t write, I will get depressed. And angry. And insomniac. And anxious and unpleasant.

Truthfully, I’m an insomniac all the time anyway. But when I get out of my writing rhythm? I get a little snarly.

If I don’t get unfettered time with my family, I will get depressed. And angry. etc. etc.

I’m a homebody, through and through. A job that required a lot of travel or late/weekend hours at the office? Inconceivable.

I’m a workaholic. I have to force limits on myself or I will never turn off that part of my brain much to my detriment.

This is something I’m discovering about myself a bit belatedly. It would be impossible for me to quantify the amount of time I spend thinking about my job and how to do it, which in some ways is great, but in other ways? I need to reconcile that better with the deep-seated craving I have to spend so much time with my family and my writing.

I have a tendency to dive into things a little too fast. Now that I know that about myself I am better about waiting even when I really really really don’t want to.

My friend Laura likes to tease me about being a “Yes!” person, which is truly a fundamental part of who I am. I like to throw doors open and see what’s on the other side, and it’s near impossible for me to turn down interesting opportunities.

I really like new challenges. I really like to learn new stuff.

This is why I keep trying new tech-integration ideas, new short stories, new poems and have daydreams about new courses and texts to teach. I love learning new things, and I love stretching myself in ways I hadn’t imagined before. As you can imagine, this plays nicely with the previous trait….until I end up with fifteen projects to juggle at once!

Here are some of Dawn’s conditions that I do not yet identify with, but would like to someday:

I know my own worth much better than I did this time last year and I’m willing to stand up for it.

Because I’m not as afraid of failure, I’m more willing to take a leap, which means I’ve tried a lot of new things and some of them have even been awesome.

I’d love to write some more of these for myself–maybe this will be a two-parter? What about you–what have you learned are essential ingredients for work-related happiness?